Ebook Free Einstein Meadows: The Unspoken Perils & Thrills of Living in a Retirement Community, by Ned and Nancy Engel
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Einstein Meadows: The Unspoken Perils & Thrills of Living in a Retirement Community, by Ned and Nancy Engel
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Faced with a major loss of services, daring seniors throw caution to the wind and embrace ganjapreneurship.This humorous novel relates the efforts of two idealistic New Yorkers who try to save a failing Southwestern community of retired professors who think they have all of the answers. Upon starting their new journeys, the academics bring their old baggage full of intrigue, power grabs, endless backstabbing, insecurity and one-upmanship so prevalent in their prior work settings.First, Nancy and Ned encourage their neighbors to grow a vegetable garden, then herbs and ultimately to dispense medical marijuana. Eventually, the crop frees most of the seniors from financial and mental constraints and they enjoy life more. But not before the Elder Blasters shoot it out with bandits who try to steal their weed. The enlightened residents participate in Senior Olympics; create a circus troupe; ride around town in a Woodstock bus; host transgender, gay and lesbian weddings; shed their clothes and create the Einstein Meets Esalen Institute.
- Sales Rank: #4196892 in Books
- Published on: 2015-12-10
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.02" h x .42" w x 5.98" l, .59 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 196 pages
Review
"Einstein Meadows is amazingly prescient and FUN!!! Sounds like the kind of place so many of us want to end up. BRAVO!!! I say it's worth 5 STARS." - J.E. Manning
Pre-Publication Residents' Reactions
"My friends and I have enjoyed reading your new book out loud. It was like looking in a mirror. Bravo!" - Zachariah Denker
"Thanks for reprinting all of my community memos. I had a lot of fun stirring the pot." - In solidarity, Captain Anonymous
"You captured the true frontier spirit of this neighborhood and deserve a six gun salute." - Your friend, Cowboy Bill
"I adore the way you described my luscious body. I could just lick you both!" - Love, Bella Blozkop
"In spite of what you wrote, the HOA budget numbers do add up. If you weren't such a good shot, I'd challenge you to a duel." -Buford Swindler, financial advisor
From the Author
Einstein Meadows teeters on the cliff of bankruptcy soon after Ned and Nancy arrive. However, through the couple's youthful energy and initiatives, this southwestern enclave now enjoys success. Today, less than three years later, the community is 100 percent full. Einstein Meadows now benefits from a waiting list of buyers and no Homeowners Association dues.So how does a neighborhood go from stagnation to rejuvenation in such a short time? We invite you to join us on an incredible adventure, which was a life-altering experience. Moving to a new neighborhood can have many unexpected consequences - none of which are easily predictable from reading typical retirement guides. But, this is fiction and anything can happen at Einstein Meadows! Sometimes finding the right location has very little to do with the climate. It's not just where in the world you want to be - or what type of dwelling you desire - it might come down to who lives next door or down the street. Retirement communities make many promises in their advertisements and especially when you first visit. Einstein Meadows offered the possibility of a university culture transplanted into suburbia - that sounded great to us. After all, who needs a golf course when you can have equestrian trails? We humbly offer a cautionary, albeit fictional tale about what might lie beyond the entrance gates of your new community. We recognize that many people are afraid of change and attempt to mandate conformity. Perhaps you share this belief, especially if you already live in a retirement community and have sat through board meetings where the officials were meditating on whether a flea has a belly button or making an elephant out of a fly. In our travels, we heard so many laments about senior developments that we decided to write a story that demonstrates that change is possible and that there are always healthier paths. You could think of this novel as a fanciful and humorous look at retirement communities. Although you probably read silently, this book is great fun to read out loud with a group of friends. They can spontaneously adapt to the different characters' voices, and turn any party into a happening. We liberally sprinkled Yiddish words throughout the book, and they really enhance the oral reading experience. These colorful expressions are fun to use in everyday life. We define them in the Yiddish dictionary at the end of the book. If you're not sure how to pronounce the words, just say them with confidence and plenty of feeling. And if you can clear your throat spontaneously, so much the better! You might want to watch movies starring Woody Allen, Mel Brooks or Gene Wilder to perfect your delivery. Hey, impress your friends, surprise your enemies and most of all have fun. We welcome the opportunity to meet our readers in person, autograph their copies and read parts of our book. Please ask the director of your community activity center if they would like to have us as guest speakers. We would also be happy to present to book club members, congregations, cannabis culture establishments, residents of RV parks, and members of naturist clubs (it's always fun to read the book in the buff). Our goal is to create a nationwide movement of seniors having a rollicking good time. We look forward to meeting you!
From the Back Cover
Ned and Nancy embark on a path to create systemic change to save their foolish investment and cross swords with officious board members Brunnhilde Meeskeit, Leopold Spieber, Filbert der Dorftrottel and Ima Khazzer, who rule over the convoluted committee system and spread quicksand and venom at every step. Dr. Freud whispers commentary about the residents in Ned's ear, while Captain Anonymous places provocative letters in everyone's mailboxes. Sister Pashkudnik and Brother Shaygetz exchange biblical barbs at raucous community meetings and Wild Cowboy Bill demands order by shooting his twin six guns in the air. Today, less than three years later, there is a waiting list to buy houses and no homeowners association dues. How did it happen? Please join us on an amazing journey!
Most helpful customer reviews
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Caught myself wishing a few times that I had retired to Einstein Medows where I could enjoy the gardens and the never dull dynam
By Hannah
A motley crew of seniors rescuing their retirement home by growing medicinal marijuana. When does the movie come out? The book was chapter after chapter of laughs. Caught myself wishing a few times that I had retired to Einstein Medows where I could enjoy the gardens and the never dull dynamic. Eagerly awaiting volume 2 and a movie and TV spin off.
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
A truly fun read!
By Judith Hanna
A delightful book about the vagaries of faculty. A truly fun read!
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
I love the short chapters and the longer chapters being scattered ...
By DrDave
Chapter to chapter, Einstein Meadows: The Unspoken Perils & Thrills of Living in a Retirement Community was both zany and madcap. The book was a quick read. I love the short chapters and the longer chapters being scattered with subheadings. It created a quick moving unpredictable type of mayhem, somewhat like the feeling one gets in watching a Marx Brothers’ movie. Einstein Meadows makes heavy use of Yiddish references and therefore I was happy to find the Yiddish to English dictionary in the back of the book. Not being of Jewish heritage, some of the references were obscure but quickly became understandable with a simple flip to the dictionary. The list of characters, including Sigmund Freud, grew ever longer as the book progressed and consisted of wild but metaphorically meaningful names. The characters often reminded me of the Larry, Darryl and Darryl sketches on The Bob Newhart Show of the mid-seventies in which Larry’s outrageous stories often held more truth than fiction. I also enjoyed the insertion of Shakespearean-esque asides by the authors. Their appearance here and there drew me into the story and gave me a sense of being a personal confidant of Ned and Nancy Engel the authors and primary characters of this fictional fantasy.
The book ends with a tantalizing “TO BE CONTINUED.” I can’t wait.
David Giannascoli Ph.D.
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